"Oh Man"

What am I searching for? I have a feeling, I'm missing the big picture of an inside joke. I'm pretty sure this is going somewhere. I hooked up with my recent ex-boyfriend yesterday, after being somewhat aggressive, spamming his inbox ha. Geez, I hope it's not my biological clock ticking... Is it true? Dirty thirty? ha I don't know but that's not cool. Tired. so tired. tons of work to complete and start. no sleep. why. really why. "To sleep, perhaps to dream." I can't wait for the semester to be over....

Tonight was a good night...I attended Wing Night and reunited with old friends. It was a good one and now, I can disappear again... It's funny because people around here thought I moved away.... ha sad ): oh Grad School, you consume my life....

Early today, I met up with Mai, Kai and Cody<3! I adore Cody but we never get any work done. Kai watched the New Girl on her laptop, Mai disappeared for a bit lol and Cody and I made jokes, but tried to relate it to the reading or an assignment ha! That kid... ha My Grad school buddies. I should make the best of it. This will be my last time, partying it up like a college girl.. ha blaaah

Ocean

I'm thirty since saturday, October 26. I can't believe it... I think when i apply myself, I look my age -___- thats pretty scary ha

SO i'm bummed, Halloween is tomorrow and I still have this ridiculous cold sore on the side of my mouth ): blaah my life. ha. wqaaah! It's like high school all over again ha

Rad news: I got accepted into Kappa Delta Pi, International honor society. Seems cool. I should learn how to take care of my nails. I need a manicure. My nails are growing beautifully, strong (: but they're getting too long -___- le sigh. I started taking Biotin a couple of days ago. My eyelashes are already pretty long and full, so i hope it adds volume. I should do some research to see if it has any adverse effects for those already blessed hahaha

Nothing new has happened but I did have a good birthday. I also feel my birthdays are becoming a pattern or a coincidence. Last year, I had a random hook-up and this year I might have repeated the act, but I hope this one will hang around. Amazing (:

I'm such a loser.

But Sad News: Lou Reed, don't leave me. Masturbation will never be the same again lol You'll be missed. And Still hot at 71, Great life kid (: Thank you for all the svveet-ass tunes (: You'll be here forever

Okay, I'm going to end it here.

"Storming the Death Star"- Roots Radics

It's been awhile. I know it's been awhile and I'm glad that i'm finally updating this blog. I've been through a lot since the last post. I'll just gloss over it with how I feel at the moment. Some things should stay in the past and some things just don't need to be brought up again.

Today, I feel fine. I'm getting well again. It was a struggle to find this sort of peace and I hope it lasts for awhile. I need to stop stressing myself out. School is school and if it stresses you out, take it easy. I know I want this and killing myself for it is not going to help me enjoy it when i achieve it.

I control my level of involvement. I control my level of involvement. I control my level of involvement.

Soocho Jade (it promotes protection) (:

I promise to be a nicer sleeper...

I'm awake, and I don't think i'll be sleeping anytime soon, le sigh. Maybe I should lie down again and see if it works. I will eventually. Today I looked at an apartment with Allison, and I'm excited. I hope we get it. I want it. I'm ready to move in now! A hidden gem. Music gives me peace. I wish I could find someone to play the music, I like listening to. I need to play more. SO i do hope i get that apartment, so ALlison and I can jam whenever we want all day/night long in our awesome duplex (: Living Room...

SUndays

I guess, I should post something. Something. I finally graduated from undergraduate studies. It was a long strange trip. mmm. I got an amp, and I've been having a lot of fun with it... .....This picture captures a Sunday.

Weird

is a word that sums up every relationship I have ever had with a virgo. I don't get it; I don't get them; I don't get myself. It's crazy. We just started this romance, and I feel like i've ruined everything. I'm an emotional wreck, and my unsteadiness could be rooted to my parents. I shouldn't blame them for all of my wrong-doings, but I feel this is the only way I can approach these inner demons with hopes of releasing them. For the first time, I felt jealousy. Maybe I felt it before this and never quite understood the strength of this attribute. It's not charming, and it will destroy a blooming relationship. I ruined it.........blaaaaaaah

maybe I'll give it space with hopes that whatever happened last night will just be a distant memory. I can't believe i ditched my boy. I was so high, and I let him down. I feel like a fool. A fool is what I feel like........